Q. I really like this guy, yet I can't really tell if he's interested in me or just wants to be friends. I want to ask him on a date but I don't want to look thirsty. What should I do?
A. You only have one life to life, right? So, that means you don't have time to second guess or overthink things. If you like him, make it known. Tell him that you think he's attractive and you would love to hang out and possibly get to know him more. See what he says. Either he will say yes or no. But you'll never know until you ask and see. So be brave sis, you can do it.
Now, for whatever reason, if he says no understand that there are plenty more fish in the sea. So don't sweat it. Just move on to the next!
Q. How do you trust someone else when it comes to collaborating?
A. As a student in high school and even college, I hated doing group projects. Mainly because I'm hard working, creative and I like to be in control. And you know when you do group projects, there's always a weak link in the bunch. I remember there was one time where a group member didn't hold their weight on a project and I ended up getting bad grade. That scared me for life. Ever since then, I became super protective over assignments and would rather complete things myself because I knew the quality of work I could produce and more importantly I knew I would be on time. Well, when it comes to collaborations, I can't lie I sometimes have that same mindset.
This is one of the things I struggle with when it comes to building my brand. I know that in order to grow and reach a bigger market, you have to collaborate with people. Yet, I always have a fear that what happened in college will happen now, people won't get my vision or they won't be able to match my work ethic and it won't work. It's hard, I won't lie. But it has to be done. The best advice I have before you collaborate is to do your research. See what that person has done before and what their track record is when it comes to their brand. Ask around to other people for feedback about their work/work ethic. Then, if you feel they're a good fit, pursue a collaboration. If not, move on to the next. Remember, be exclusive with who you work with because at the end of the day, their work will be a reflection of your brand as well.
Q: I have a savings account, yet saving is not my forte. I'll put money aside just to take it back out a month later. What should I do to really see growth in my savings account?
A: Saving is something I'm still learning to master. Trust me at one point ya girl had a balance of $0.00 in her savings account, so I understand your struggle. The key to saving is to always think of your end goal. Once you have a goal in mind, it's easier to create a plan and tackle it. For example, before I moved I knew that I wanted to have a certain amount of money in my savings to live off of. So, I had to determine how much I had to set aside from my check each week to get me to that goal. Of course there were times I wanted to take the money and buy some shoes, but I had to remind myself that I would be broke in NYC if I did that. My temptation to transfer money to my checking quickly erased and I surpassed my goal.
Here are a few tips to remember when tying to grow your savings account:
- Start with a realistic goal.
- Cut out the things that you don't need.
- If you're scared that you will use the money, get a locked savings account that you cant touch!
- Download my favorite budgeting app Mint, to get a better understanding of your spending
Q: I'm constantly working to build my online business. There are nights when I have to stay up late or miss out on game night because I have to focus. My boyfriend is starting to complain about me always working and I don't really know what to do. How you do balance personal life and building a brand?
A: Well girlfriend, I'm currently single lol. However, it's by choice. Being that I'm in the beginning stages of my brand, I'm always busy trying to elevate in anyway that I can. Whether it's staying up late working on posts, shooting for my blog, or attending events, I'm always doing something pertaining to my brand. Therefore, I don't really have the time to invest in someone wholeheartedly. Now, don't get me wrong, I date. But, I'm clear at the beginning that I'm focused and my main priority at the moment is my brand. For you, being that you're in a relationship, you have to move a tad differently.
First, I want you to really ask yourself what is most important. Is it your brand or your relationship? Then ask yourself, what is your end goal with both your brand and your relationship? If you want to have both, then you have to find a balance. Whether you allot certain days to your brand and certain days to bae, there are ways to make it work. Now, if he truly loves you, then he wants the best for you and wants to see you reach your dreams. Therefore, there should be some understanding of your hustle. If he doesn't want to understand, then maybe you should reconsider some things. But have the conversation and see what comes of it. Then act accordingly!
Q:My co-workers are constantly slacking and I feel as if I'm always left to finish their work. I've went to my boss and expressed my concern but yet nothing has changed. I'm over it and to be real, this job isn't for me. I don't know what to do but I know I need to make a move ASAP. How would you suggest I move forward?
A: I've definitely been there..working at a job that you don't like and feeling as if your concerns aren't getting acknowledged. Yes, it's definitely frustrating and honestly there were times I didn't know how I would be able to face each day without having an attitude. However, one thing I learned about Corporate America is that it's all a game. Until you are able to make the move and transition to the job of your dreams, you must learn how to play the game.
- Continue to do your job to the best of your ability so that no one can discredit your work.
- Don't give in to your co-workers laziness and act out of character.
- Determine what you really want to do, as far as a career, and create a realistic plan of action
Also, remember, that this is just a stepping stone in your career and it won't last forever. You're there for a reason. So learn all you can to help get you ready for the next step!
Q: I'm really shy and I find it hard to initiate conversation with strangers at networking events. I know that I need to build my network if I want to grow and become successful, yet, I don't really know how to start. What should I do?
A: The biggest thing I recommend when going to networking events is to go alone! I know that may sound crazy, especially when you're nervous to speak to people you don't know, but it helps. When you go alone, you're forced to talk to others and people are more open to talking to you. Start off by finding something you like about the person, whether it's the way they dress, their choice of beverage or even something as simple as their hair. Compliment them, (people love compliments) then follow up with more inquisitive questions pertaining to their career and/or goals.
Also, remember to ALWAYS have your business cards when you go to networking events. While we live in the age of social media and someone can easily pull up your Instagram account, it's more professional to hand them your business card instead of your handle. Be sure for every card you hand out, that you receive one in return or some form of contact information. That way, once the event is over, you can follow up with each person you met and start to build your network!
Q: I've been dating this guy for a few months now and I actually really like him. My mother has always told me that a man should always pay until it's official. But times have changed and I don't want to seem like I'm using him. Should I pay the next time we go out?
A: Lol, crazy that you asked this because my friends and I just had this discussion. You're right, times have definitely changed. Courting is still important these days, but in my opinion it works both ways. After about 4 dates, I believe you should take the initiative to pay, especially if you like him. Now, don't offer to pay if you're going to have an attitude about it. Do it willingly. Not only does that show that you are looking at this as a partnership, which is the foundation of a great relationship, but it also shows that you aren't dependent on his money.